Another day, another exhausting pronoun debate. Pronouns are simple, they’ve been around for centuries and yet, people are acting as if they’re a new concept—when they’re not using them as political and bullying fodder, of course.
This time the hot-button topic is being discussed not because of some horrific comments from hardcore politicians or the terrible tweet by a certain She-Who-Will-Not-Be-Named TERF (Trans-Exclusive Radical Feminist), but because the singer And artist Demi Lovato announced that she’s now using “he/she” pronouns in addition to the “they/them” pronouns that were already used.
Lovato opens up about this evolution in her gender identity journey in an interview with spout podcast, “Lately, I’m feeling more feminine and, therefore, I’ve adopted her again,” Lovato said. “I’m such a fluid person.”
lovato Revealed as non-binary in May 2021 Along with a video and Twitter thread that informed the public they were going by their/their pronouns. “Today is a day I am so happy to share more of my life with all of you – I am proud to tell you that I identify as non-binary. [and] Will officially change my pronouns to they/them going forward.” Lovato wrote on Twitter,
during the interview spout podcastLovato considered this coming-of-age and also explained why they are now expanding their pronouns to include “he/she.”
“I felt, especially last year, my energy was balanced in masculine and feminine energy,” Lovato said. “When I was faced with the choice of walking into the bathroom and it said ‘female’ and ‘male,’ I didn’t feel like there was a bathroom for me. Because I didn’t necessarily feel like a woman, I was a woman.” didn’t feel like a man, I felt like a human. And that’s what he/she is to me, it’s just about feeling human at my core.”
Lovato’s Instagram bio has been updated to include all of her pronouns: “they/they/he/she.” What’s so shocking about it? Gender identity—much like sexuality—can be a very fluid thing. It is also extremely common in the non-binary community to have more than one pronoun. I myself am non-binary and go by similar “he/they” pronouns. The interesting thing here is less Lovato’s gender journey—which is her business and her business—but the apparent bias of the news media machine.
There were misleading headlines about how Lovato “reverted back to the pronoun ‘he/she'” (daily mail) (The Match has since Original title amended, Glamor UK ran like this wrong titlewhich has not been fixed yet. some people called buzzfeed,s The coverage refers to Lovato as “she” only in the story and to make it sound like “he/her” as their only pronouns. Many news outlets had good, sensitive headlines, such as Rolling stone, Board, Diversity And a whole range of others.
Then there was a ruckus on social media. Responses range from “who cares” to non-binary and queer ones to outright fanaticism, which indicates that updating pronouns is over-common. Many more were his allies within the queer community. Note that Lovato didn’t stop using ,they them, Pronoun And encouraged people inside and outside the media to understand the difference.
Sadly though, when you search for Demi Lovato on Twitter, the first thing that pops up is prejudiced posts. famous transphobe Matt Walsh was quick to jump on the news As an example of someone “changing their gender identity” (Lovato didn’t) while spreading dangerously misinformation about gender-affirming surgery. Some transphobic individuals used Lovato’s non-news to further stigmatize gender-affirming surgery. Word ,de-infection“Even thrown around—even when what happened was, in fact, a person expanding their use of pronouns.
,While Lovato still identifies as non-binary, they are simply updating their pronouns to reflect where they are now on their gender journey.,
Lovato didn’t “revert to her pronouns,” she simply added “he/she” to the list of pronouns. There’s a huge difference. While Lovato still identifies as non-binary, they are simply updating their pronouns to reflect where they are now on their gender journey.
Portraying his words as “returning” or any variation of that phrase legitimizes a favorite argument among older people, that non-binary is merely a phase or fad. Or that Lovato was somehow returning what her idea of a “real woman” is, securely boxed back into her gender binary.
To be clear: being non-binary is not a step and it is not an option. Gender identity is fluid and means that people can add or subtract pronouns, and they can also identify if they wish. It gives identity no less legitimacy, it is just a part of the journey.
Why is someone updating their pronouns even in the news? I don’t see news stories about cisgender celebrities proudly claiming to go by “he/she” or “he/she”, so why are we putting non-binary celebrities on blast? Like coming out – another tabloid obsession – pronouns are a personal matter for someone, not your clickbait.
Pronouns have always been a part of our human vocabulary, but have recently become a political pawn for far-right and transphobic fundamentalists. But everyone has pronouns—even the most straightforward, most cisgender human beings on this planet have pronouns. The point, of course, is out of basic human decency, respecting one’s choice of pronouns and being grown up about.
For non-binary people, we can have multiple pronouns and that is because we do not identify as singular gender or any gender for that matter. There are some non-binary people who just want to go by the pronoun “they/them”. Some non-binary people go by “they/them”, but also by “he/her” or “he/she”. It depends on the individual, so the best policy is to always just ask and never assume.
,If their pronouns change, call them by those pronouns. It’s not really that challenging of a concept. This is basic decency.,
Personally, I go by either “they/them” or “he/her” and it’s not because I define myself as a woman, because I don’t. I still go by “he” because I go by “he” for 27 years of my life and it’s easier for me and probably other people in my life to still use that pronoun. The thing is, non-binary people don’t need to explain to anyone why they go by a certain pronoun – just be respectful and call people by the pronoun they go by. And if their pronouns change, call them by those pronouns. It’s not really that challenging of a concept. This is basic decency.
Currently, this country is facing more transphobic bills and laws than ever before. Pronouns have become a major theme in political speeches and forums. Apparent transphobia and homophobia have reached heights of horror and show no signs of slowing down. Being non-binary right now is scary. Being transgender right now is scary. This is a scary time for all LGBTQ people. The media must cover matters such as gender identity with sensitivity and responsibility—because when headlines and social media chatter go wrong—as some were about Lovato—the legitimacy of many people’s identities is undermined.